Surprisingly Simple Thoughts To Stretch What Might Be Possible

here's what expanded my mind this week

1. WHAT IF we can stretch ourselves simply by drawing our attention to what’s directly in front of us? I know Sweetheart, this is a difficult ask because it’s tricky to stop constantly leaning into the next moment. We have no way of knowing if there is refuge ahead but we DO know what is right in front of us (even if it sucks). Keeping our attention here and reminding ourselves that we can do this one thing may offer us a sense of ease. I’m all for planning and making the damn lists (a sacred act in my book), but then let us surrender to what we are doing as we’re doing it and see if it allows our mind to settle down a little.

   Question: are you able to hold your focus on the thing that’s right in front of you or do you tend to leap ahead, would you like to change this?

   

   Me, at -16C in British Columbia, Canada 📸B Weigert

2. WHAT IF we consider that most everyone is doing the best they can? We have no possible way of knowing what’s going on in their head or their life, so perhaps we can lay down our idea about what we think they should do. My gorgeous friend, let us take our opinions about their life, set them down and walk away! Maybe if we understand that we can’t make them do something, or change their mind, it will offer us a little space in our being to rest, and to stop working so hard in an effort to bring them around to thinking just like us.

   Question: do you have a lot of opinions about what they should do, or only ideas about a couple of special people in your life, or is this so rare for you that you don’t know what the heck I’m talking about?

3. WHAT IF we remain in our own head and heart to get through hard times, holding whatever is exploding within us with tenderness? What I’m saying Sweetpea, is that we can get through tricky situations using our innate wisdom without using booze, drugs, or being a meanie. We will be ok just sitting in the discomfort of the moment only to come out on the other side.

   Question: do you distract yourself when you get emotionally uncomfortable?

4. WHAT IF doing the ‘right thing’ isn’t always the right thing for us? Figuring this out calls for personal responsibility and discernment which are actually superpowers. What I’m saying is if we feel like we need to show up to be a good person - because it’s the thing to do - but we know that we really don’t want to do that thing and it’s likely going to make us feel yucky inside (in this case yucky feels like anger, resentment, or frustration) then it’s not the right thing to do, even if it appears that way to someone else. Anger, resentment or frustration are a big signal that we are not on the right path. Got that Love-Muffin?

   (More on this in an upcoming post on guilt, so if you’re one of the rare humans who occasionally has guilt stay tuned).

   Question: do you say yes to stuff when you absolutely don’t want to do it and then show up pissed right off? Have you ever tried saying no in those situations? Are you getting better at saying no?

I thank you with my whole heart for being here with me, it means so much. May you tackle your hard things with pluck and aplomb (doesn’t that sound delightfully old-fashioned!) and keep being the kick ass person I know you are.

xoxo Donna

Here are a few amazing things I thought you might like:

Troy Putney

is a writer, photographer, and conservationist hoping to help others fall in love with this planet and join in the movement to create a more sustainable and just society. You can find his beautiful work at

In Search of Supreme Beings

.

Over on

Quantum Nomad

you can checkout

Beckett Johnson

‘s stories that reveal life’s messy truths, spark unexpected shifts, and remind you why connection matters most.

My good friend S. Black❤️ gave me the book Horse, by Pulitzer Prize winner Geraldine Brooks. Based on the remarkable true story of the record-breaking thoroughbred, Lexington, who became America’s greatest stud sire, Horse is a gripping, multi-layered reckoning with the legacy of enslavement and racism in America (I took that sentence directly from her website). This book made me stand in awe and respect for an author who wove a tapestry of stories that bound together a legacy I will never forget.