The Art of 'Having Your Shit Together'
Lessons from the produce aisle
What does having your shit together look like? I saw it once in the produce section of our grocery store. I’m not kidding, and I find it interesting that I’ve never forgotten it.
Perhaps it’s like a human-secret-sauce that can’t be bought, it must be earned. It might be an essence that we wear as a subtle energy. Anyway, this couple exuded it to such an extent that I stealthily followed them around the store, sneaking peeks from behind my grocery list. I wanted to know them. I wanted to be them.
It wasn’t about what they were wearing, although they looked great. It wasn’t about their health, although I could tell they lived a vibrant lifestyle, and it wasn’t about what they said or did because I didn’t interact with them.
It was how they carried themselves (and just in case you’re picturing some hot, young, glam couple - these two were in their seventies).
I’ve noticed that having our shit together (sorry, I just couldn’t think of a better term that would fully encompass everything I mean in the same way this one does!) exudes itself in a certain way in our body. It’s consistent no matter what we are going through, even if we feel we are currently not holding all the balls of life in the the air. We can be grieving, in physical pain, in the middle of making a difficult decision, or falling in love, and our special-secret-sauce holds strong within us. This characteristic is a benchmark we hold ourselves to.
I think this human-secret-sauce is something that is both earned and learned. While it soaks in by osmosis as we’re navigating our special life lessons it’s also something we can practice as we go about our day. A simple thing we can do is to remind ourselves that we have a right to fully take up our space in this world, as does everyone else. Stand tall my friend (I mean that literally because folks who have their shit together don’t slouch), make eye contact, and be kind!
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I can guess what you’re thinking…that I’m full of baloney because there’s no way that carrying ourselves a certain way will affect things that much. Yee of little faith! Remember that sometimes the smallest things will create a big shift if done repetitively.
All the rest is gravy. Just kidding, you and I both know all the rest is very difficult which is why it’s great to have an easy place to start. You are amazing and don’t you forget it.
Thanks for being here, I’m so glad. You know the drill lovey…it’s the internet and the powers that be need you to hit the ❤️button so they keep me around!
xoxo Donna
P.S. I’m curious if you’ve ever followed someone around the grocery store? Why did you do it.
Hi Donna, I love this idea of "having your shit together" and for me I guess I would describe it as someone who knows deeply who they are, who embraces both their gifts and their challenges - also known as their shadow or their "muck" (in case you don't know, I LOVE the Lotus flower metaphor that we grow and blossom BECAUSE of our muck, not in spite of it) and they stand in their sovereignty and power, knowing the right use of power is to ease their own suffering and then allow that to ripple out to help to ease the suffering of others. And I think every single human being on some level "has their shit together" but our patriarchal cultural conditioning can be toxic - can you tell I'm passionate about this subject? 😁 The post I just shared touches on this too.
I have not - people probably follow me around, though, because I look odd.
Anyway, excellent article and quite relatable!