This was a really beautiful read Donna. It hit home for me in a deep way.
I love the way you started the piece in one perspective and then circled back to explain the initial story.
I also found your acknowledgment of the many different sides of us complex humans to be a very valuable point especially in the context of our journals. It made me think about my own journals and how if anyone was ever to read them they would probably conclude that I’m insane because of how all over the place my entries are depending on how I am feeling and what has happened that day.
I also felt that your piece conveyed the value of letting go in a way that allows one to move forward. And I think doing a concrete act - like disposing of your old journals - as a way to symbolise that letting go, is a very powerful thing indeed.
Thank you Michael! I think if a fellow journal writer read any of our journals they would understand, we get the circuitous route of brainstorming. It's not insanity but rather figuring things out which is rarely linear.
Interesting your word symbolize, it immediately brought to my mind the lack of symbols I have in my life. I was listening to a podcast this weekend where the speaker mentioned she often will buy herself a small thing when she has something to celebrate and that thing becomes a symbol of her achievement. I like that. I'm going to think about other symbols in my daily life to see what pops up.
“... it’s figuring things out, which is rarely linear” - I love that Donna, wonderfully put.
As for the symbols idea, that is really interesting. I don’t have that many objects that have symbolic value either, but what I do have - being a skateboarder- is a few skate videos I’ve made with my friend over the years, which nowadays function as symbolic reminders of that time in my life.
Hi sweetie. I love being part of your membership circle already. I love your mission and message. When the Artists Way was first published I wrote two pages everyday. Later I wrote in journals haphazardly. And then I stopped. I wasn’t feeling better. The journals and therapy kept me on a hamster wheel. Two months of EMDR was more helpful than 20 years of therapy. More recently I’ve been journaling with a mission. I decided I prefer active meditation to other types. I’m doing mind body work that includes personal growth. I’ve never been more motivated and joyful. While I’m still working on healing I am loving life. Your post resonated. Thank you. 🙏❤️
Thank you so much for your comment CK, I appreciate you being here.
That the journals and therapy kept you on the hamster wheel is something I've been thinking about a lot lately. I am a huge advocate of both but also think there is a lot to be said for simply moving forward from where we are now, rather than processing the past. While I respectfully acknowledge that trauma can be crippling, I do wonder if the new cultural trend to taking a deep dive, often without professional help, into childhood trauma is a good thing? It is not my wheelhouse so I can't say for sure.
EMDR! That's fantastic. While I have never tried it I have read a lot about it and would turn to it in a heartbeat. So glad it helped you and so glad my post resonated with you.
I advocate therapy as well but at a certain point it’s time to move forward, as you say. I just wish there was more mental health practitioners in the US.
Yes, there is a huge shortage here too. My other career choice would've been as a psychologist but I didn't figure that out until too late. When I was in school it seemed like that field would never really amount to a career but thankfully that has changed so much!
The combination of Jesus and EMDR has been a huge part of my healing journey. I am glad you have found it to be helpful too. I am an external processor, but sometimes no matter how much you talk about past pain, you need something to help get you 'unstuck' that moves you through it. God used EMDR to help get my brain and body out of unhealthy patterns from past trauma.
I started consistently journaling in 2020. I can't imagine getting rid of them because they have been a powerful way to document God's faithfulness in my life. However, in the times when it was hard for me to put my pain into words, I kept track of stories in pictures. God is helping me get to the place where I can write the stories behind the photos. He is helping me see that I can grieve what I lost but be grateful for what I found - Him!
Kaitlynn this is amazing! You have done some amazing work and it's fantastic you are documenting it. The pictures and words you're recording in your journal, your journey to healing with God's help is very powerful.
I love that when it was too hard to write you used pictures. Are they photos or do you draw them?
Thank you so much for this beautiful, encouraging comment!
They are photos and screenshots of things God used to encourage me. I started sorting the photos based on patterns that I noticed throughout them. The presence of glitter was a prominent one, which is probably not a surprise based on the name of my newsletter. 😂✨
This rings so true, Donna, though I'm not quite at the point of wanting to discard my journals, in fact I'm going through some of them now for a project I'm working on. (There are precisely 2,643 citations on variations of "I'm too fat."😂) Whatever it takes to "lighten the load" huh? Good job.
I found something similar in mine, a lot of it was a bitch sessions about the same old stuff. Sure, there were some great things that I couldn’t believe came out of my own head but then there was the rest🥲
I was at a place where I felt those words were tethering me to remain stuck, and I was ready to let them go. Now I remind myself the wisdom that was in those books lives in me, I didn’t throw it out with my journals (I hope🤣)
Thank you for sharing your journey with journaling. I was so relieved to read that you didn't get rid of all the pages. I shared in another comment how I couldn't imagine getting rid of mine because they have been a powerful way to see God's faithfulness in my life. However, I have found some old google documents that I wrote when I was in a hard season. I had forgotten about them. They feel like they were written by a stranger. I am glad that I still have them because, again, I can see the growth that I have made since then. Also, I have a passion for praying for people in pain and pointing them to Jesus. I am grateful that I have reminders of my own journey because it helps me to meet people where they are at in their own journey. It can be so easy to forget where we have been in light of where we are now. I don't want to be held captive by my past, which I know could be a danger if we spend too much time there. I think the Gospel gives us freedom to explore our stories because we are defined by what God did for us through Jesus not by the things we have done or not done over the course of our lives✨.
Thanks for your vulnerability + inviting us to think more deeply about this topic!
I agree it's good to have reminders of our own journey and I held on to those. However, I got to a place where I wanted a fresh start and to write in a different way. I didn't want my writing to be about complaining about the same old little things that were frustrating me, I'm choosing to look above and beyond that so we'll see how it goes! I'll keep you posted.
Thank you so much for taking the time to leave such heartfelt comments, I appreciate it.
Yes, please keep us posted and thanks for replying to me! It means a lot when authors take the time to interact with their readers! It is a little thing that makes a huge impact, but I know it takes so much time! 💖
Connection is the most important thing to me. It means so much when folks take the time to like or comment on something I have written. When it can be a back-and-forth dialog it becomes even more meaningful.
What an important story, Donna! I’m rather new to journaling and my one page per day ritual won’t be filling up bags anytime soon, but I definitely understand your decision and am impressed with the level of fortitude it took to do this! I thought initially I would never look back at a page again, because it makes me cringe, but after a particularly dark period this winter I am eager to have the highs and lows for points of comparison. I find it interesting that I rarely discuss the kids’ issues when journaling and I also make it a point to do a lot of noticing my feelings when journaling rather than writing about what others said or did - maybe this will make me more likely to want to keep them and look back? Only time will tell, but your story is one that will stay with me as I continue my new daily practice. Thank you so much for sharing it with us!
Thanks Katy. A lot of what I found in those journals was 'the same old' story and I want to break that cycle. I have started a new journal that is similar to the way you do it. After reading your interview with Sophie (feel free to link it in the comments here) I'm inspired to do one page-a-day type of writing. I think a lot of ground can be covered, or cleared away that way.
I appreciate you taking the time to read and comment.
This was a really beautiful read Donna. It hit home for me in a deep way.
I love the way you started the piece in one perspective and then circled back to explain the initial story.
I also found your acknowledgment of the many different sides of us complex humans to be a very valuable point especially in the context of our journals. It made me think about my own journals and how if anyone was ever to read them they would probably conclude that I’m insane because of how all over the place my entries are depending on how I am feeling and what has happened that day.
I also felt that your piece conveyed the value of letting go in a way that allows one to move forward. And I think doing a concrete act - like disposing of your old journals - as a way to symbolise that letting go, is a very powerful thing indeed.
Thank you Michael! I think if a fellow journal writer read any of our journals they would understand, we get the circuitous route of brainstorming. It's not insanity but rather figuring things out which is rarely linear.
Interesting your word symbolize, it immediately brought to my mind the lack of symbols I have in my life. I was listening to a podcast this weekend where the speaker mentioned she often will buy herself a small thing when she has something to celebrate and that thing becomes a symbol of her achievement. I like that. I'm going to think about other symbols in my daily life to see what pops up.
I appreciate you taking the time to comment.
“... it’s figuring things out, which is rarely linear” - I love that Donna, wonderfully put.
As for the symbols idea, that is really interesting. I don’t have that many objects that have symbolic value either, but what I do have - being a skateboarder- is a few skate videos I’ve made with my friend over the years, which nowadays function as symbolic reminders of that time in my life.
Hi sweetie. I love being part of your membership circle already. I love your mission and message. When the Artists Way was first published I wrote two pages everyday. Later I wrote in journals haphazardly. And then I stopped. I wasn’t feeling better. The journals and therapy kept me on a hamster wheel. Two months of EMDR was more helpful than 20 years of therapy. More recently I’ve been journaling with a mission. I decided I prefer active meditation to other types. I’m doing mind body work that includes personal growth. I’ve never been more motivated and joyful. While I’m still working on healing I am loving life. Your post resonated. Thank you. 🙏❤️
Thank you so much for your comment CK, I appreciate you being here.
That the journals and therapy kept you on the hamster wheel is something I've been thinking about a lot lately. I am a huge advocate of both but also think there is a lot to be said for simply moving forward from where we are now, rather than processing the past. While I respectfully acknowledge that trauma can be crippling, I do wonder if the new cultural trend to taking a deep dive, often without professional help, into childhood trauma is a good thing? It is not my wheelhouse so I can't say for sure.
EMDR! That's fantastic. While I have never tried it I have read a lot about it and would turn to it in a heartbeat. So glad it helped you and so glad my post resonated with you.
I advocate therapy as well but at a certain point it’s time to move forward, as you say. I just wish there was more mental health practitioners in the US.
Yes, there is a huge shortage here too. My other career choice would've been as a psychologist but I didn't figure that out until too late. When I was in school it seemed like that field would never really amount to a career but thankfully that has changed so much!
The combination of Jesus and EMDR has been a huge part of my healing journey. I am glad you have found it to be helpful too. I am an external processor, but sometimes no matter how much you talk about past pain, you need something to help get you 'unstuck' that moves you through it. God used EMDR to help get my brain and body out of unhealthy patterns from past trauma.
I started consistently journaling in 2020. I can't imagine getting rid of them because they have been a powerful way to document God's faithfulness in my life. However, in the times when it was hard for me to put my pain into words, I kept track of stories in pictures. God is helping me get to the place where I can write the stories behind the photos. He is helping me see that I can grieve what I lost but be grateful for what I found - Him!
Kaitlynn this is amazing! You have done some amazing work and it's fantastic you are documenting it. The pictures and words you're recording in your journal, your journey to healing with God's help is very powerful.
I love that when it was too hard to write you used pictures. Are they photos or do you draw them?
Thank you so much for this beautiful, encouraging comment!
They are photos and screenshots of things God used to encourage me. I started sorting the photos based on patterns that I noticed throughout them. The presence of glitter was a prominent one, which is probably not a surprise based on the name of my newsletter. 😂✨
I love the name!
This rings so true, Donna, though I'm not quite at the point of wanting to discard my journals, in fact I'm going through some of them now for a project I'm working on. (There are precisely 2,643 citations on variations of "I'm too fat."😂) Whatever it takes to "lighten the load" huh? Good job.
I found something similar in mine, a lot of it was a bitch sessions about the same old stuff. Sure, there were some great things that I couldn’t believe came out of my own head but then there was the rest🥲
I was at a place where I felt those words were tethering me to remain stuck, and I was ready to let them go. Now I remind myself the wisdom that was in those books lives in me, I didn’t throw it out with my journals (I hope🤣)
Thank you for sharing your journey with journaling. I was so relieved to read that you didn't get rid of all the pages. I shared in another comment how I couldn't imagine getting rid of mine because they have been a powerful way to see God's faithfulness in my life. However, I have found some old google documents that I wrote when I was in a hard season. I had forgotten about them. They feel like they were written by a stranger. I am glad that I still have them because, again, I can see the growth that I have made since then. Also, I have a passion for praying for people in pain and pointing them to Jesus. I am grateful that I have reminders of my own journey because it helps me to meet people where they are at in their own journey. It can be so easy to forget where we have been in light of where we are now. I don't want to be held captive by my past, which I know could be a danger if we spend too much time there. I think the Gospel gives us freedom to explore our stories because we are defined by what God did for us through Jesus not by the things we have done or not done over the course of our lives✨.
Thanks for your vulnerability + inviting us to think more deeply about this topic!
I agree it's good to have reminders of our own journey and I held on to those. However, I got to a place where I wanted a fresh start and to write in a different way. I didn't want my writing to be about complaining about the same old little things that were frustrating me, I'm choosing to look above and beyond that so we'll see how it goes! I'll keep you posted.
Thank you so much for taking the time to leave such heartfelt comments, I appreciate it.
Yes, please keep us posted and thanks for replying to me! It means a lot when authors take the time to interact with their readers! It is a little thing that makes a huge impact, but I know it takes so much time! 💖
Connection is the most important thing to me. It means so much when folks take the time to like or comment on something I have written. When it can be a back-and-forth dialog it becomes even more meaningful.
What an important story, Donna! I’m rather new to journaling and my one page per day ritual won’t be filling up bags anytime soon, but I definitely understand your decision and am impressed with the level of fortitude it took to do this! I thought initially I would never look back at a page again, because it makes me cringe, but after a particularly dark period this winter I am eager to have the highs and lows for points of comparison. I find it interesting that I rarely discuss the kids’ issues when journaling and I also make it a point to do a lot of noticing my feelings when journaling rather than writing about what others said or did - maybe this will make me more likely to want to keep them and look back? Only time will tell, but your story is one that will stay with me as I continue my new daily practice. Thank you so much for sharing it with us!
Thanks Katy. A lot of what I found in those journals was 'the same old' story and I want to break that cycle. I have started a new journal that is similar to the way you do it. After reading your interview with Sophie (feel free to link it in the comments here) I'm inspired to do one page-a-day type of writing. I think a lot of ground can be covered, or cleared away that way.
I appreciate you taking the time to read and comment.